Throughout the journey of parenting, there exists a constant push and pull for control. It starts early, when bedtimes and eating carrots are suddenly up for debate. The older they get, the harder it is to communicate. Cries and coos are easier to interpret than the fragmented sound bites teenagers give. To make matters worse, in order to stay in step, parents have to understand the language of technology and decode such messages as C U 2MOZ (“see you tomorrow”) and SRY 4GT 2 CAL LST NYT (“sorry I forgot to call last night”).

Still, even with this more cryptic form of communication, parents should be diligent in monitoring their children’s interaction with others. Unfortunately, monsters do not stay in our kids’ closets. They are harder to find – especially those that exist in this new online world.

Lori Varnell, an Assistant District Attorney for the Tarrant County Economic and Computer Crime Unit, serves on the front lines of cyberspace by protecting children from online predators. Her job is more of a personal life’s mission – one she believes was created when she witnessed a friend being abused by her friend’s father. A third-grader at the time, Varnell was frightened and fled. “I was scared. I ran and hid under a tree and sobbed. Looking back, I think it was a defining moment for me to protect kids.” Today, Lori has made it her life’s mission to not only prosecute online predators, but to educate parents on the dangers of children’s participation in online communication.

The statistics are startling. One in five U.S. teenagers who regularly log onto the Internet say they have received an unwanted sexual solicitation via the Web (Crimes Against Children Research Center). Yet, even with this reality, only one-third of households with Internet access are actively protecting their children with filtering or blocking software, according to the Center for Missing and Exploited Children. When asked why most parents are not involved in their child’s online activities, Varnell points to several factors, including not wanting to infringe on their child’s privacy. After all, kids have a right to privacy…right? WRONG!

According to Varnell, kids may have a right to privacy from the government but have no right to privacy from their parents. “Parents should be consistently monitoring their children’s online activities,” says Varnell. “Ironically, once a child is victimized, the government is the first place the parents call. Many of the cases in my cabinet drawer could and would have been prevented by an alert, monitoring parent.”

So what can parents do to make sure their kids are safe on the Internet? Here are a few tips:

Discuss the dangers
Talk openly to your kids about the dangers of online predators. According to Varnell, “Kids and teens need guidance. They are not sophisticated enough to navigate their way through the online world of predators.” Make them aware that predators use subtle tactics to access personal information and insist that they not share any personal information or pictures with strangers.

Keep computer in common room
It is much more difficult for your child to get into a dangerous conversation with a potential predator when the computer screen is visible to parents. Avoid putting a computer with internet access in a child’s bedroom and be present when the Internet is in use.

Monitor online activity
Monitoring all forms of your child’s electronic communication is essential. This includes chat rooms, instant messages, and emails. It is also important that parents know their online buddies and to investigate any new friends that may emerge. Varnell puts it well when she says, “This means you can’t be afraid to get in their space and get on their MySpace.”

Utilize parental controls
There are many types of computer monitoring and blocking software available. Parents should select software that can be customized and modified based upon the child’s age and the appropriateness of the websites. Parents should keep in mind, however, that even with parental controls in place, ongoing monitoring is still essential to ensure your child is protected.

Keep communication lines open
Finally, it is essential that lines of communication remain open – even with your less than chatty teen. Kids should be instructed to go directly to you when they receive any form of communication that is suspicious or sexual in nature. According to Varnell, “keeping this healthy line of communication open with your child is the most important key to keeping them safe.”

Varnell states that society’s battle with online predators is indeed a fight between good and evil. “There are people in this world who are evil and the best place for them is in prison.” However, law enforcement must work in cooperation with parents to prevent online predators from harming our children. “This is a battle for our kids and it is not a battle that we as Americans can afford to lose.”