A busy New York sidewalk

DMN

Is complaining now part of our culture – and is that a good or bad thing?

Moving from Britain to New York, I was amazed at how much people there complained.

In restaurants, New Yorkers would fearlessly send dishes back to the kitchen, tick off waiters and tap overloud guests on the shoulder.

I had a friend who would return clothes, if so much as a wrinkle appeared after the first wash. “Upgrading,” she called it.

A British friend quickly got to grips with the legal system and in no time she had sued her partner, employer and landlord.

At a performance of “Madame Butterfly,” a child actor burst into tears, as he was about to say his lines. Instead of an embarrassed silence, which would have followed such an incident in Britain, a chorus of “get the kid off the stage” erupted from the audience.

American English even has an extra word used for complaining that the British never use: "It sucks."

By the time I left New York, I had my too had own lawsuit going and was unafraid of hushing talkers in movie theatres or asking people to remove their bags from seats on busy trains, so I could sit down.

In laidback Texas, I don’t hear so many complaints. Maybe it’s because people don’t live on top of each other here, so there is less cause for griping.

I was recently in line behind a New Yorker at D/FW airport waiting to get a ticket changed. We waited for three hours, as two Delta employees dealt with 500 people. She couldn’t believe people were putting up with it. “New Yorkers would be baying for blood by now,” she said, as we all casually waited our turn.

But compared with Brits, Texans are more inclined to stand up for their rights and are far more litigious. Just look at the number of law offices here.

A Dallas friend told me, "I save $3,000 a year by complaining."

My flight to Britain on United Airlines was recently cancelled after seven hours of waiting in lines to find out what was happening. With my one-year-old son in tow, it was an experience not to be repeated.

I called up United’s call center in India to complain. To be honest, complaining to somebody in India doesn’t feel as good as complaining to somebody here, but I did get $300 back for my efforts.

I now have a problem with my apartment. Steve, the manager of the building, has been so nice and helpful, it has really been hard to get into complaining mode. But maybe I will have to rally some of that New York spirit, if things don’t improve.

WFAA.com staffer Lucy Jones writes First-Time Mom, which appears every other Friday.   E-mail o8sis